A hard day's work

Lamb's Quarter Farm, August 2010

The simple thing that makes a Saint

I went to a talk a few months ago, and the priest kept emphasizing that,

"The difference between a regular person and a saint is that the saint perseveres."

Let's face it, life is hard, and we all struggles under the weight of many crosses, hardships, and challenges. Discouragement so easily sets in, and destroys the peace of our hearts and the shaky trust of our souls. Many times, its so much easier to give into discouragement than it is to choose perseverance. Inherent in perseverance is not simply the ability to continue picking up our crosses, but picking up our crosses in faith that God will bring good out of our hardships and gradually accomplish His perfect purpose in us.

I woke up this morning very discouraged. Ironic after my post yesterday, but sometimes, experiences discouragement is a very natural response to difficulties - a feeling that just comes upon us. There are a number of aspects in my life right now that I wish weren't going the way they are. I have been in a job for nearly a year that I do not enjoy - it doesn't challenge me or stretch me professionally, and my dedicated efforts to find something better haven't been fruitful so far. I still don't really have any idea what my vocation is, whether I am to be married, or religious, or simply stay single forever. It's difficult to proceed with blind faith on that one, while simultaneously seeking clarity about God's will for me. I am rather pennyless, and although I can gratefully afford the basic necessities of life, it's frustrating not to be able to afford a car and have the independence that a personal vehicle brings.

The difference between a regular person and a saint is that a saint perseveres.

So instead of giving into discouragement, I will try to invoke the Holy Spirit to help me trudge on in faith, that "in difficult moments I might not become despondent but submit myself to His most holy will, which is love and mercy itself."

"How you can stop worrying and enjoy the single life"

Thanks to a recommendation from a good friend, I recently discovered a fabulous blog written specifically for Catholic singles called "Seraphic Singles: How you can stop worrying and enjoy the single life." I've gotta say, this is the most refreshing and encouraging resource I have found for Catholic singles in a long time. Unlike many Catholic popular writing which simply dismiss the single life as a transitory phase (hopefully brief) that young people are a part of before embarking on their permanent vocation to be either married or religious, the author, Dorothy Cummings, encourages and inspires readers to live life fully as a single. She emphasizes the ways in which God is calling, leading, and working in the lives of singles and ways in which we can respond to these calls.

Sometimes the single life is a phase of preparation for the vocation of marriage or religious life, but it is not simply that. She maintains that God has a purpose for everyone's singleness, and we need to trust in His infinite Providence. I would say that her blog is summed up as "How do I best live the single life and how is God calling me to holiness in this very moment?" This attitude is what she calls being a "Seraphic Single."

She also has excellent, nuanced, and entertaining thoughts on the struggles and idiosyncrasies of the Catholic dating scene. I think that her honest analysis of the plight of searching singles is not only incredibly accurate but also enlightening. I definitely read through several months worth of postings the first day I found her blog. I look forward to reading the rest of the archives as well as reading her new book, "The Closet's all Mine!"

I found one of her recent postings about "The Goodness of Gratitude" to be particularly inspiring, and perhaps you will too. It's a reminder that instead of grasping for things that God doesn't have in store for us at the moment, we need to learn to be grateful for the gifts He has showered us with. Cummings says,

"My list of beatitudes has changed since I married, but my stance of gratitude has not. To choose to live in gratitude is to vote for happiness. It is not the province of married people. There are thousands of married people who have chosen to be miserable. If I set my mind to it, I could make myself miserable by blowing up my husband's occasional cross moods into monstrous injustices, by worrying endlessly about money, and by wailing over my lost academic career...Instead of smiling at the little children I see on the beach, I could weep and wail because they're not mine. But I don't choose to. I don't choose to be miserable. I choose to be happy. Happy rocks my world."

Trained by His discipline

The second reading at Mass today really spoke to me, and I wanted to share some of my reflections here.

Hebrews 12:5-7, 11-13:

"Brothers and sisters,

You have forgotten the exhortation addressed to you as children:
“My son, do not disdain the discipline of the Lord
or lose heart when reproved by him;
for whom the Lord loves, he disciplines;
he scourges every son he acknowledges.”
Endure your trials as “discipline”;
God treats you as sons.
For what “son” is there whom his father does not discipline?
At the time,
all discipline seems a cause not for joy but for pain,
yet later it brings the peaceful fruit of righteousness
to those who are trained by it.

So strengthen your drooping hands and your weak knees.
Make straight paths for your feet,
that what is lame may not be disjointed but healed. "

When I heard this reading, I thought about the word "discipline" both in the sense of "being disciplined", but also in the sense of "growing in discipline." I must admit that by nature, I am not a very disciplined person. Case in point, my blog is updated, not multiple times a week as I had set out to do, but on a whim, when the spirit moves me. I know that discipline is something that I need to grow in, but unlike some people who have a penchant for creating order and discipline in their life that they might achieve specific daily goals, I have often viewed the virtue of discipline as stark, challenging, and just plain boring.

One of the phrases that really stuck out to me in this passage was the phrase about being "trained" by discipline. Discipline certainly is a training - it's strengthening your will to choose the good; it is a slow process, wherein which we train ourselves, and allow God to train us to follow His ways which often means denying ourselves instant gratification. The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines discipline as "training that corrects, molds, or perfects the mental faculties or moral character, and also "control gained by enforcing obedience or order orderly or prescribed conduct or pattern of behavior."

It means saying yes to that which makes us better people, and saying no to that which tears us down. It is these little decisions, this specific framework, that shapes that pattern of our character through a gradual process.

The reason that this line really spoke to me is that it was an encouragement to me in perseverance. Often times, when we are in the middle of learning a specific discipline, whether physical or spiritual, and training ourselves to act or respond in a certain way, it is pure drudgery and often times, even painful. In the midst of the moment, all we see is how uncomfortable we are, or even the pain that we are experiencing. For example, when an athlete is running sprint after sprint, ready to keel over from exhaustion, it's hard for him to see the larger picture - the way that this is making him a better player.

photo by wwarby

He just knows that he is out of breadth and incredibly sore. It's not until days, months, or years down the road, that he realizes how those hours of grueling running drills helped him win the championship game. Later, after the most trying moments of learning this discipline, does the person recognize and experience in a profound way, that peaceful fruit of righteousness. Basically, to be able to endure and develop discipline, a person must have the eyes of faith. They must have the faith to trust that their decisions of self-denial will help form them into a better person, even if one is distracted by the pain of the moment rather than the success of the outcome.

About 7 weeks ago, I embarked on the discipline of eliminating sugar and chemical sweeteners out of my diet. I decided to do this for health reasons, and while it was something that I had contemplated for awhile, meeting with a nutritionist who also recommended this dietary change motivated me to actually take the plunge and whole-heatedly make the change. Although I am feeling so much better after eliminating sugar out of my diet and noticing vast improvements in my health, it's not to say that they process and the commitment has been easy. In fact, it's been really hard at times. But then I am reminded that the result of this discipline will inevitably be better health, and that is so much more important and satisfying than momentary gratification.

Because of this new commitment in my life, I especially liked the closing line of this passage, "Make straight paths for your feet,
that what is lame may not be disjointed but healed. " Sometimes, it's difficult to make these straight, narrow paths through discipline. But it is only through this discipline that we will be healed, be it body, mind, or soul.

What a beautiful vision the Lord gives His children in this passage. And I am certain He gives us the grace in abundance too.

Touching the hearts in our midst

"What powerful preaching there can be in simple contact with a soul! One single soul can change the whole moral atmosphere surrounding it by its solitary light."

~ Elisabeth Leseur

I recently finished reading the "Secret Diary of Elizabeth Leseur." This book is filled with the writings of Elisabeth, a devoted Catholic young woman living in upper-class Paris in the early 20th century. I had read several excerpts of Elisabeth's writings in the Magnificat magazine over the past several months, and these meditations really spoke to me. I think one of the main reasons was because Elisabeth was a lay woman, seeking to live the faith in profound ways in the midst of secular culture. Elisabeth was married to Felix Leseur, a french physician who, although raised Catholic, became an atheist and was extremely hostile towards the faith. Through her writings one can see the depths of faith that Elisabeth had, praying fervently for her husband's conversion, accepting suffering with patience and fortitude, (she suffered many severe ailments, and eventually succumbed to breast cancer in 1914) and striving to touch the souls around her with the love and light of Christ.

I was greatly inspired reading Elisabeth's diary. I particularly found her dedication to intellectual study and authentic culture and arts impressive. She understood the value of acquiring knowledge and wisdom in order that one might be able to more fully communicate truth, as well as the ability of the fine arts of the day to convey Beauty.

What most spoke to me though, was Elisabeth's total commitment to loving the souls placed in her path in her ordinary life. As a lay, married woman, Elisabeth was did not have the framework of a religious community, or even the benefit of a supportive husband in order to encourage her in this mission. She also remained childless, a cross which I imagine brought her great suffering insofar as she was unable to participate in the vocation of biological motherhood. And although she was involved in charitable work earlier in her life, when her illness set in, she had to resign herself to let the Lord use her suffering, rather than her action, to evangelize the culture. So the reader sees as they read her diary, the way that she come to accept her humble but vital purpose in life to reach out to those souls put in her path. In doing so, she offers an inspirational example to lay Catholics, particularly I think, lay professionals who wonder how it is that they can concretely serve God's people in the secular day-to-day.

Some of her thoughts which were particularly inspiring to me:

"Let us love. Let our souls and our lives be a perpetual song of love for God first of all and for all human beings who suffer, love, and mourn.

Let profound joy live in us. Let us be like the lark, enemy of the night, who always announces the dawn and awakens in each creature the love of light and life. Let us awaken souls."

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"Let us not linger in contemplation of the road ahead; let us follow the narrow path. Let us not look too far or too high, but right in front of ourselves, right next to ourselves. The good to be done is perhaps there."

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"Grace alone can bring about conversion; without it, we can do nothing for a soul. But can we not prepare the materials for grace? Can we not put into people's minds new ideas that, when touched by grace, may one day rise and live? It is humble work, demanding much patience and tact, and it must be performed without expecting any result but what is willed by God and known only to Him."

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"Those we encounter along our earthly path cast a distracted look in passing upon the outer wrappings of our being, and go their way, confident of knowing us sufficiently. Let us take care not to act in the same way toward the companions of our life. Even in a brief encounter, we can touch a soul, or, even more, achieve a profound insight into that which is hidden beneath appearances: a whole person, a whole life, of which others remain in perpetual ignorance."